College: Winter Term

Woohoo!  I’m keeping up to speed with the updating, even if it is almost tomorrow.  Did that make sense?  Cuz it’s so late?  Man I hope I’m not this awkward on the radio…that wouldn’t make for much of a career.

Thanks for the positive feedback and thoughts on my previous post!  It’s lovely to hear from y’all even if I’ve been away for awhile.  Winter Term at NCC was the term that snuck up on me and sped by; I blinked and it was already week 8!!  In a way, it was a blessing.  The new year proved to be a bigger challenge than I was expecting it to.  I started Winter Term as an education major enrolled in an Intro to Teaching class.  At the end of the first week of classes, I knew that I had to get out of there quickly.  I didn’t know what my calling was, but I knew that I wasn’t cut out to be a teacher.   I have the utmost respect to everyone who pursues education, because I didn’t have it in me.  Week 4, I had so many meetings with different advisors and professors, who all wanted what was best for me.  With that being said, I withdrew from my education class, dropped the major, and switched to political science.  I’ve always been fascinated with the law and politics, so this seemed to be where I’d be best at home.  As soon as I officially switched majors, it was like a huge weight had been lifted off of my shoulders.

I faced an unexpected challenge during Winter Term; I’ve always enjoyed the warm months and even into fall because everything is beautiful.  However, after Christmas, New Year’s, and even Valentines Day I get a touch of seasonal depression; nothing serious, but enough to make me dreary and not want to get out of bed some mornings.  It came at an unfortunate time and hit me unexpectedly…I was finally falling into a good crowd at school and figuring out schooling and where I wanted to end up in the future, but something was off internally.  To top things off, Ed and I hit a few rough patches through those 10 weeks.  Valentines Day came and went and, being a hopeless romantic, I was really looking forward to spending the weekend with him.  Our first Vday was perfect; we packed a picnic and went body sledding on a frozen hill by my house, where I used to play as a child.  It was really picturesque and wonderful and so new – I had thought he was going to say the long awaited “L WORD” on Vday but ended up being a bit too nervous and unsure of how I was feeling (HAHA).  But, I digress.

Ed had decided to take the semester off of school to focus on getting a full time job as his child support was increasing as Noah got older, so even though he was looking for a full time job, he was still only getting 14-20 hours at his current job, which isn’t enough to support Noah, himself, and his girlfriend on Vday so we laid low and made cookies on the 13th, and went to his sister’s voice showcase the next day with his whole family.  It was a nice weekend, but I felt like he passed by relatively unscathed.  It seems incredibly superficial, but I don’t think he wished me a happy Vday the whole weekend, which makes me a little sad.  It sparked a huge fight between the two of us but we eventually patched the hole and moved on.

A big blessing that I got during Winter Term was finding my close friends.  Taylor and  I became close with two boys our age on the football team, Adam and AJ.  The boys weren’t roommates but lived on the same floor as each other, and Tay and I grew close with many of the boys on Seager 2; however, she and I both say that Adam and AJ are our favorites.  We are still close to this day and I consider them two of my very best friends.  We’re actually all in the same residence hall on the same floor (!!!!) this year, and I can’t wait to have practically all my best friends living in such close proximity.

I know Winter Term was a little on the lame side, but it honestly was such a blur and went by so quickly.

OH!  I ALMOST FORGOT!!!  For Christmas, my parents surprised me with two meet & greet passes to my FAVORITE artist Ron Pope’s show in Chicago on February 26th.  Initially I was going to bring Ed but decided to go with his little sister Maggie instead.  We had the most amazing night and Ron Pope sang my favorite songs, gave me three hugs, and absolutely positively made me fall in love with his music all over again.  That was the third time I have gotten the privilege of seeing him perform live and it never gets old.  I’ll be showing my children his music one day.

Alas, I’m losing motivation for this one.  All in all, Winter Term was a good one.  I’d give it a 7/10 – and that’s with the gross weather!

xoxo

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My roommate/best friend/partner in crime was being a SASSY bitch and took SO many sleeping Rachel pictures during Winter Term.

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Taylor, AJ, Adam, and I at the Brunswick Zone near school.  This was one of the first nights we all hung out (not pictured are all of our other guy friends lol) and it was a BLAST!

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Sonata killin’ it at Clash of the Sequins Showchoir Competition – 2.13.2016

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The only picture we took on Valentines Day, and it was actually the night before.

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Mags and I waiting for Ron Pope! We were actually the front of the line and were FREEZING by the time we got in.  Ron actually walked past us a few times and said “can’t wait to see you in there!” and I nearly passed out.

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AHHH!!!  RON FREAKING POPE!!!!  I still get butterflies when I think about this moment.  PSA: He’s a really good hugger.

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Awwww my lil fam.  This was the day after the RP concert and even though I had a huge helping of Post Concert Depression, they helped make it better.  (Adam, AJ, Me Tay).

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College: Fall Term

Alriiigghhhtttt…since I have so much to update you all on (and by “you all” I mean the 4 people who used to read my entries), I’m going to break it into sections.  I’ll start with each of my 3 terms of freshman year and then work outwards to social life, relationships, etc.  Sound good?  Good.

Moving in was a day with so many emotions.  Mostly, it was bittersweet.  I remember standing in the middle of my empty bedroom, the place where I have spent the majority of my life for the past 11 years, and just being baffled that even though I was moving out it still looked remotely the same.  Like, isn’t everything supposed to be wildly different once you move out?  For me, I was shocked at how much it still looked like my room.  In a way, it was comforting because I knew that I could come back home and have it still be home.

There were a lot of tears when I said goodbye to my family; they helped me unpack and get my side of the room ready for when my roommate finally arrived (I moved in a week early for a theatre camp in downtown Chicago), we sat and suffered in the heat for three hours because the air conditioning in my building was apparently not turned on yet, and then we ate hotdogs and tried to socialize with all the other camp participants and their parents.  Eventually, I had to go to the opening ceremony for my camp and it was time to say goodbye to my family for the first time in my whole 18 years.  (I should note that I’m getting anxious and choked up just thinking about this moment).  I walked my parents and little brother (who is 16 and towers over me at 6’0) to my dad’s car, and that’s when we pretty much fell apart.  I don’t remember who I said goodbye to first.  I think it was my brother Michael, who laid his head down on my shoulder and shook with tears.  We have a pretty close relationship now as we are growing older, but hadn’t particularly gotten along always growing up.  However, his raw emotion is something that I felt so strongly and since then, I have a new appreciation for my brother who is fixated on making sure his hair falls nicely and gives me crap about literally everything I do.  Up next was my dad, who gave me a hug, let me cry on his shoulder, and tearfully told me that he would text me so we could get lunch soon.  I have seen my father cry a handful of times in my life; twice when his older brother and father passed away, twice when we put our dogs down, and once when my aunt passed away.  I can add the day he moved me in to NCC as one of those days and I was not expecting it.  Like Michael, my dad’s emotion rocked me.

I knew saying goodbye to my mom was going to be the hardest thing for me – over the past four years we have grown closer than I could have ever hoped and ever thought I wanted.  She is my best friend (I know I’ve mentioned this before).  I clung to my mom as though it was going to be the last time I saw her ever (even though I only go to school 20 minutes away from my house).  She told me to be strong and that she was proud of me and of course, to call and text her whenever I needed/wanted to.  She was so strong, and I could see through her tears that she really was proud of me.  Everything I do, I do it for my family.  They are my biggest support system and I could do nothing without them.

I went to theatre camp and it ended up being a little bit of a bust – mostly it was an awkward weekend spent with people I didn’t know, competing to impress the theatre department chair.  I look back on that weekend and I think that’s when I started to become more unhinged from theatre.  It was a gradual process but doing that camp definitely set it off.  I did meet a really great friend, though!  Elizabeth and I got each other through that weekend and although we aren’t as close anymore, she was my first friend at NCC and I have a special place in my heart for her.

Honestly, first term was such a blur.  There is, of course, the awkward stage of getting to know your roommate, balancing social lives with academia, trying not to get lost on campus or in the buildings, accidentally sleeping through your 9 AM finite mathematics class, getting sick the first time away from home, inevitable homesickness, and getting used to the craziness that is college.  Not all of it was bad, though!  I met so many amazing friends and have a lot of crazy memories with my roommate Taylor from first term (ones that we do NOT expel to just the average reader).  Something that I struggled with a lot that I didn’t expect was balancing school friends with Ed, my boyfriend at the time (more on that in a separate post).  While Taylor didn’t mind him hanging out in our room or being on campus with us occasionally, I didn’t particularly enjoy mixing the two groups of people in my life.  At the time, I didn’t understand why; however, I think looking back, I liked the fact that I had a life separate from Ed and wanted to maintain that for as long as I could before I had to be back in a twosome.  Don’t get me wrong, I loved hanging out with Ed.  It was just harder to balance the two than I thought it would be.

A huge blessing in my life came to me the second week of freshman year, on September 22nd to be exact (I remember because it was Ed and I’s 9 mo anniversary).  I auditioned for a coed a cappella group on campus.  At this point, I had no idea about collegiate a cappella other than what they show in Pitch Perfect.  I went into the audition mildly terrified but also very excited – essentially they had us sight read a verse and a chorus of Pompeii by Bastille and sing, individually, a verse and a chorus of a song of our choosing.  I decided, haphazardly, to sing Sun by Sleeping at Last.  Nervous doesn’t even begin to describe how I was feeling but as soon as I got onto that stage and started the song, I felt good – like it was destined that I was supposed to be singing one of my favorite songs for a bunch of random strangers.  By the grace of God, I was selected from 60 people to be 1/8 new members of Sonata Problem.  I don’t know how to describe how amazing they are, but I love each and every one of them, past and present.  But more on them later!!!

First term of my freshman year of college (so weird, still) was a whirlwind of activity and emotion packed into 10 short weeks.  There were times when all I wanted to do was curl up in a ball and scream; other times, I felt like I could conquer anything and everything, and dared anyone to tell me otherwise.  It was probably my least favorite term this year, but in retrospect I don’t think that’s fair to say because I wouldn’t change any of it – every single thing that happened in those 10 weeks made me into the person/student/friend/daughter I am today!  And that’s pretty darn cool.

I know this wasn’t a super in-depth rehash of first term but it’s honestly a little foggy.  I told the important parts, but mostly it’s important for anyone who is gearing up for their first (or second, third, or fourth) year at school to remember that even when your world feels like it’s crashing down onto you or you’re holding your 16 year old brother by the shoulders and telling him that all he has to do is drive 20 minutes to see you, college is such an incredible experience and to get ready for the best 4 years of your life (so far)!  All the struggle, stress, anxiety, money, exams, cram sessions, all-nighters, everything is so freaking worth it.

That’s all I’ve got tonight.  I’ll be back tomorrow to rehash my second term (and maybe my third if you’re lucky)!  For now, I’m going to listen to sad music from the Grey’s Anatomy soundtrack because sometimes, it’s what you need.

xoxo

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I love this picture…it’s me, my roommate Taylor, and our next-door neighbor Dominique. This was taken in November and little did we know, in a matter of months we would all be best friends and would be rooming together in the fall of 2016!

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SONATA PROBLEM at our first gig!  Well…a tiny fraction of us.  But still!  We are here!!

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The above two are Ed and I on our one-year anniversary.  We went ice skating and just spent time together at his house, coincidentally getting each other the same gift of scrapbooks and photo albums (because I love scrapbooking and he knew how much I loved pictures).  This was probably my favorite day spent with him.

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Starting off 2016 the right way!

Oh, hey there.

I’m officially the worst blog-runner in the history of the world.  I’m pretty sure it’s been seven years since I last posted.  Just kidding.  Kind of.

Anyways, the past two weeks-ish has been a crazy whirlwind of change and emotion and giggles and laughter and crying, I’m so emotionally exhausted.  Let me tell you, packing a lot of change into two weeks really takes it out of ya.  For the most part, I know everything is going to be excellent and the change is for the better.  However, sometimes I have a hard time remembering that it’s going to be difficult before it gets fun.  I’m having a hard time coping with the fact that I’m not gonna be living at home come Thursday.  I’m incredibly close with my family, especially my mom, and we’re both taking it pretty hard.  I know it’ll be fine and it will eventually make us closer, but I’m trying to soak up every last moment.  I’m trying to do that with everyone, really.  My last day of work at the Starbucks I was at (before I transfer to the one at school) was on Saturday and it was such a bittersweet day!  Saying goodbye to the people I’ve grown so close with over the past year sucked.  It’s nice knowing that I’ll be missed, but I will definitely miss everyone at the O&P store.  (Even though sometimes I’m pretty sure it’s hell).

A fun thing that I did during my hiatus was go to the One Direction concert!  I’ve loved them for five years now, so seeing them live in concert was so surreal!  I went with Ed’s little sister and his mom.  It was a blast spending a night in the city with them.  Sunday night was the concert and then, on Monday, we stood outside Niall and Liam’s hotel for two and a half hours and waited for them to come out!  Unfortunately, we left about two hours early, because some of the girls we were standing with sent Maggie pictures of them and Liam after we had left.  It sucked not being able to see them up close, but that concert is one that I’ll remember forever.  Their song 18 reminds me of Ed, so I was a wreck when they played it on Sunday.  I love him so much, and sometimes it slaps me in the face when I least expect it!

I’ve been getting ready to go to school, packing, saying goodbyes, etc., for the past few weeks and one of the hardest things I’ve had to do was say goodbye to Meg.  She’s attending the University of Iowa, which is 196 miles away from me.  She’s been gone for almost two weeks and it feels like two years.  I miss her terribly.  I’m going to road trip to her one of these weekends, and I can’t wait.  Another sad thing I’m having to do is say goodbye(ish) to Ed.  Even though we’re going to school very close by, I know it’s not going to be the same.  I’m going to be in a new school, living in a new home with someone I’ve met once, starting at a new store, taking new classes, and living on my own, full time…so even though I’ll be out of the strict grasp of my parents, we aren’t going to be able to see each other much.  He’s working as much as he can, taking class, and being a dad.  Our schedules are absolutely jam packed, and I’m sad that we won’t always be together.  Tomorrow I think I’m going to go to his house and spend some time with him, just the two of us, because it’ll be the last time before I move in, I think.  I want the last few days of summer to myself and my family, because I’ll miss them more than anything.  But I haven’t left yet and I already miss Ed’s cuddles.

All of this change in a short amount of time is very overwhelming.  I do know, though, that in the grand scheme of things, it will be all worth it.  I couldn’t be more excited (sans terrified) for this next journey!

Advice (and other shenanigans)!

Yo yo yo!  Sorry, that was annoying.  Soooooo anyways, here’s the follow up most from my last blog (found here) about the struggles (but also joys) of dating a teen parent.  Let me clarify something, before we even get started: I knew Ed was a teen dad when I first got to know him, and I’ve never had the mindset of being Noah’s “New Mom” or “Other Mom”.  I didn’t enter the relationship so I could babysit someone else’s kid.  I was purely in it for Ed, and still am.  Do I care about Noah?  Absolutely.  He’s an extension of Ed, which makes me love him as much as everything else about Ed.  Plus, he’s the sweetest little boy you’ll ever meet.  So that’s a bonus.

Now that I got that very important tidbit of information out there, we can continue.  I’ve recently experienced a lot of unfamiliar emotions in regards to my relationship.  There’s something to be said about watching someone you love interact with his child (I say his purely because that’s my situation).  He lights up when he sees his son, and likewise for when Noah sees his dad.  He did an amazing job of studying and reading all the books when Noah was on his way and when he was younger.  Just the other day he was educating me on the safety of making sure the child’s car seat buckle was placed properly over his sternum to prevent asphyxiation in the event of a car crash.  He would’d agree with me, but I can tell that he’s proud of everything he’s learned about being a dad, and he really does make an amazing dad.  He wears the fact that he’s a teen dad on his sleeve and is not embarrassed or hesitant to answer anyone’s questions or talk about Noah or his situation at all.  I definitely think that’s admirable; in a situation as complex as his, it would be easy to feel closed off to the idea of talking to someone about it.  Ed embraces it though, and it’s something that I love about him.  Even seven months in, he’ll still answer any of my questions about the pregnancy or being a dad.  Watching him with Noah makes me excited for our future.  We know that we’re young and, in the grand scheme of things, haven’t been together for that long.  We also know, though, that we want to spend the rest of our lives together.  We want to get married, buy a house, wake up next to each other, start a family together.  It’s something that I think about all the time, and I cannot wait.

In relation to that, there’s also a sadness that I have experienced.  It hit me a few months ago, that I’ll be the holder of very few “firsts” for Ed.  I won’t be his first kiss, love, partner, or even the first one to mother his children.  This was such a raw emotion for me, and it’s still something that I struggle with every day.  Ed knows that I feel this way, to an extent, but I don’t know if he knows how much it still affects me.  A few weeks ago, we sat in his car in the parking lot of the restaurant we were going into and he listened to me vent and yell and cry about these feelings, which was the first time I had expressed this to him.  I haven’t broached the subject with him again, but it definitely hasn’t gone away.  I don’t know if it every will, to be honest, but I guess that’s something that I’ll have to get through should Ed and I continue on the path that we are on.

Another thing I’ve had to deal with (and am currently dealing with) is the drama between Ed’s ex and I.  Before we dated, she and I were actually civil with each other; we sat next to each other in our Drama Lit class and had many conversations.  When it came out that Ed and I were together, the friendship that we had established was completely crumbled and she had no intentions of being my friend.  To an extent, I understand her frustration and anger.  I’m another woman who is receiving the love she received for four years; that’s a pretty raw feeling.  Also, I’m sure she was worried and angry about me meeting Noah.  Granted, this didn’t happen until a few months into our relationship, but I can imagine that there’s an insecurity that occurs when the father of your child brings another woman around that child. Recently, I’ve been trying to “bury the hatchet” (or so they say) with her, because Ed and I talk seriously about our future, and there are going to be many occasions when all three of us are in the same room together, for Noah.  They’re trying to maintain a civil relationship so Noah doesn’t have to grow up with more drama than is necessary – remember that he’s going to live with the fact that he’s only 15 years younger than his parents.  When I told Ed that I was insecure about his past relationship with her and that it made me sad, he suggested that I try to be civil with her, not only for Noah but because it would make me feel better as well.  It takes a lot of energy to be hateful towards someone.  He mentioned that, at Noah’s last doctors appointment, she asked about Ed and I, and then proceeded to tell him that she was happy for us and that she thought we were cute together.  I was skeptical at first, because this came from his ex and also the girl who blocked me on Twitter when she found out about us (I KNOW!  7th grade, much??).  However, I told him that I would make an effort in being civil with her, for everyone’s sake.

Last week, Ed’s family brought me with them on their family vacation to Michigan City.  I had the most amazing time, so when I got home the first thing I did was upload all the pictures of us & vacation onto my social media sites – Instagram, Facebook, Twitter, etc – and got many compliments from friends and family about how happy we looked.  I was happy.  The next day, I found out that Ed’s ex had said some things on Twitter about how my “time was running out” because I had “been there for a while”.  She then went on to say how she’s “always gonna be here, bitch”.  I was mad, not only because she was talking about me behind my back, but she was cowardly about it in the fact that she tweeted it because she thought, since I was blocked from viewing her profile, I couldn’t see her tweeting about me.  One thing that I’ve always had a problem with is when people talk about me behind my back.  The way I look at it is that I’m 18, and if someone has something to say, just say it.  It only makes waves when people gossip behind my back, and I find it a bit infuriating.  When I told Ed about this, his initial reaction was to tell me to brush it off because she was immature.  However, I stand firm in my decision that I’m done being civil with her.  She burned that bridge so fast, and if I’m being honest, I don’t even know if she’s intelligent enough to see that what she did will impact the future relationship between she and I.  But, I digress.

The purpose of this blog post was not to rant about the maturity of people, but to provide some sort of guidance for girls (or boys) who are going through the same situation that I am.  As big of a controversy as teen parenting is, there isn’t much support for the girlfriends or boyfriends of teen parents.  I can’t express how many times I’ve scoured the internet for a blog, support group, or even a Yahoo! Answers thread about what to do if I’m feeling this, that, or the other.  Hopefully someone who needs this will stumble across it and it’ll provide some relief.

That’s it, at least for now, on this subject.  I’m sure there will be more blog posts about this, but for now I’m typed out.

Truth Time!

Okay.  Admittedly, there was one major reason that I wanted to make this blog, and it’s for everyone who needs a resource I don’t really have.  In order for this to make sense, I have to admit something that I don’t really feel too proud of; it’s not that I’m embarrassed, it’s just something that someone my age doesn’t normally deal with or experience.  In my first post, I mentioned that I was in a happy, committed relationship, which I most certainly am!  My boyfriend’s name is Ed, and we’ve been together for about 7 1/2 months, but were best friends for about 2 months before that.  Ed makes me happier than I’ve ever been; he takes care of me, makes me laugh, and still gives me butterflies (I know!!!).  He’s the most handsome man I’ve ever met and he puts a smile on my face without me even knowing.  He’s chivalrous and insists on opening the door for me and holds my hand wherever we go – he also lets me be the little spoon and will willingly give up his share of the blanket if I get cold.  Pretty much, I’m the luckiest girl in the whole world.  On top o that, as I mentioned before, we were best friends before we started dating, so we got to know each other really well.  We would spend countless nights on the phone with each other until two, three, four in the morning somedays, and others we would drive around and goof off and enjoy each other’s company for hours, simultaneously doing everything and nothing.  He really is my best friend and the love of my life.  I know I’m only 18, but I’m quite certain I found the man I’m going to spend the rest of my life with; the most amazing part of that revelation is that he feels the same way about me.

All fairytales aside, our relationship has its share of ups and downs (somedays it feels like we get more than our share).  There are a few things that make our relationship more complex and/or mature than other relationships, especially considering that we’re only 18.  When Ed was a sophomore, he and his girlfriend of a few years at the time had a baby, a boy named Noah.  Winter of our junior year, Ed and his girlfriend broke up and went on to see other people.  Ed is still very much a part of Noah’s life, and loves his son more than anything in this world.  I was not the first girl Ed dated post break-up, we started dating almost a year after they split up.  He and his ex (who’s name I’m intentionally omitting because she would freak out if she found this, lol) have had custody battles and parenting classes and agreements, but recently Ed and she have gotten it pretty much set in a routine, in that he gets Noah every Wednesday for a few hours and every other weekend, Friday evening to Sunday evening.  I met Noah when Ed’s family celebrated his 18th birthday, one Saturday in January.  I think Ed and I were both nervous – Noah was only two at the time but I still wanted him to like me, or at least not hate me – but I think the night went relatively well.  Since then, we’ve taken quite a liking to each other.  He calls me Rachy, jumps on me, and although he won’t admit it, loves when I tickle his stomach.

Our relationship is very different than most relationships that people our age are in.  In most relationships, the couple compromises over dates and dinner options.  Ed and I compromise over whether or not we can go to a graduation party if it’s on a weekend that Noah sleeps over, or if it’s doable to attend a concert in February, when he’s not sure if he’ll have Noah.  He’s had to miss some concerts of mine because they fell on a Wednesday, and sometimes I’ll turn down the offer to have dinner at his house because I don’t want to infringe on his “Daddy-Noah time” as he calls it.  I know that he wouldn’t extend the invitation if he didn’t want me there, but it’s hard not to feel like I’m intruding sometimes.  There are times when I feel like an outsider in my relationship, or a third-party.  As much as I hate to admit it, his ex-girlfriend and he are always going to have to be around each other, at least to make Noah’s life as easy and painless as possible.  Does it upset me?  Absolutely.  I don’t think Ed would take to me constantly calling or texting any of my ex’s, and I know that it’s a completely different situation, but it still bothers me.  No girl, no matter the situation, likes when their boyfriend is talking to his ex.

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Ed and I, post one of my choir concerts
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High-fiving at prom, because it took me like five minutes to pin on his damn flower (also look how handsome he is).
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Downtown Long Beach, Michigan City, Indiana ☀︎ 8/4/15
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Noah, Ed, and I, at our friend Brooke’s graduation party last weekend. Noah and I had just gotten out of the pool (if you look really closely you can see that I’m wearing Ed’s swim trunks)

There are other aspects to this side of our relationship, but this post is getting a bit text-heavy, so I’m going to continue it in a follow-up post.  The focus of that one will be more guided help for girls (or boys) who are in my situation and are not sure how to cope with all the feelings (both expected and unexpected) that come with dating someone who has a child with another person.  For now, enjoy these cute pictures of Ed and I (and Noah, as a bonus!).

Since when am I allowed to be an adult?? (28 days!!!)

I move out in 28 days.  That’s insane.  Literally, in 670ish hours, I will be officially moved out of my parent’s house and into my dorm room.  Living as an independent adult.  (Cue: On My Own, Les Miserables).  I’m toooooooooooooooooooooo excited for college.  I’ll be attending North Central College in Naperville, Illinois, to study secondary education and theatre.  Even though NCC is only 20 minutes away from my house, I’m living on campus to give me the whole “College Experience” thing that everyone raves about.  What is this beloved rite of passage that all pre-college students hold so sacred?  I couldn’t be any less clued in.  But regardless, I’m excited!  Recently, I’ve gotten more nervous about moving out that I have been before.  It’s a comfort to know that I’ll be so close to home, but I’ve never gone longer than, like, a week without being with my family.  I know, lame right??  I love my family and I’d say that we’re pretty tight-knit.  My mom is for sure my best friend and the one who I know I’m going to miss the most.  I’m pretty sure it’s going to be harder for her than it is for me, if you can believe that.  We’ve already cried about it like seven times and I still have a month left.  I know it’s a net chapter in my life, but there’s a small part of me that doesn’t want to move on.  I really found myself in high school, more specifically junior and senior years, and I could definitely have gone another year to take the classes that I was never able to and have my favorite teachers one more time.  Now, I have to live with someone who I’ve met only once before, and I have to make a whole new circle of friends, not to mention that we’re supposed to do it in the four days they give us before we start college classes.  That’s like a full load of AP classes.  Shit.

Sorry.  Back to reality.  I’m nervous but excited and it hasn’t really set in yet.  Over the course this next month I have to pack my clothes that I’m taking for first term, pack all my new furniture and dorm supplies, start my job at the Naperville Sbux, and say goodbye to one of my best friends who’s going to University of Iowa (196 MILES AWAY).  There’s a lot to do, so I’m gonna get to it. 😬11044639_1059581294056089_2980998733190863699_o Photo on 6-17-15 at 3.24 PM

Hello world!

Okay.  Well, this is a bit weird…I feel like I’m just going to end up rambling to absolutely no one (because let’s be real, no one’s going to read this).  I think it’ll be healthy for me, though.  I’m doing this for me.

Some basics, for all of you readers out there:

  • I’m eighteen years old
  • tenjulys is actually July 10, the day I was born
  • I’m attending North Central College as a Freshman in the fall
  • I plan on majoring in secondary education with a minor in theatre
  • I love to sing, act, and be on stage
  • I’m in a committed and happy relationship
  • I’m a Starbucks barista

So, that’s me in a very small nutshell.  Not too terribly interesting, but my life is far from dull. Hopefully this blog/journal thing-a-ma-jiggy will provide some entertainment in y’all’s lives!

That’s all I got for now, peace brothers. ✌🏼